*cough*

No, I'm not sick, but I am moderately convinced my laptop came down with some sort of virus Christmas Eve. Luckily, (I think) it's all better now -- I just didn't turn it on for three days (hence the brief hiatus) and hoped it sorted itself out, which pretty much guarantees something worse will happen in about 10 minutes.

Hope everyone had a good holiday. Who's looking forward to 2009?? I am if it'll bring me a new job, more money, increased relaxation time and a slight drop in lbs. Oh yeah, and if that recession thing could go away, that'd be hot.

Give me baby, one more time

Every news source puts out the same story every year: 'So and so was the first baby born in the new year at such and such hospital.'

But you don't often see a story like the Armstrong's from Gettysburg, Pa.

Becky and Kyle Armstrong welcomed new baby Faith Lynn to the world--and 2008--at the Gettysburg Hospital Tuesday at 5:23 a.m. But...she wasn't their first, first baby.

The couple delivered their firstborn child, Kaden Skye Armstrong, on New Year's Day last year and Kaden was the same hospital's first baby of 2007.

Hospital employees said they've never seen anything like it. No kidding, I don't think anyone could do that if they tried, which I'm sure they will now.

And a little fun fact: the babies' great-grandmother also shares the same birthday.

Ordering up another round of 'Shot'

Surprise, surprise. Tila Tequila and her selected suitor, Bobby, couldn't make their relationship work and MTV has the bi-sexual dating show signed up for another season.

Tila, who hosted a New Year's Eve show for the network, announced Monday that Bobby had broken up with her because he couldn't handle her schedule or dating a "celebrity."

"The night was amazing except for the fact that Bobby had broken up with me a few days before all of this went down. I wasn't expecting it at all because I thought I had finally found someone that I was compatible with, but I guess I was wrong. My hectic schedule was really hard on him and we both were getting frustrated, but at the same time.....I just wanted to find someone who would understand what a crazy lifestyle I have so it's too bad that things didn't work out between us. With that said I just want to make it known that I still think Bobby is a great guy and I wish him the best."- from Tila's MySpace page.

On the other hand, a MySpace bulletin posted by the boy wonder claims that Tila just stopped calling him after the reunion show, which aired Dec. 23.

"She never called me after the last show and no one would give me her number so pretty much I feel like and ass but we are not 2gather u cant have a realationship bye urself ya know." - from Bobby's MySpace page.

...which should lead us all to believe that MTV demanded that the two end their relationship, especially because the finale of "Shot at Love" drew 6 million viewers--the highest of the network since November 2002.

And come on, Bobby was pretty silly, but he's not a moron (though, after reading his horrendous grammar and spelling on the post, I might reconsider). Who would land MySpace's hottest vixen (and eat animal testicles for her) and then dump her two weeks later? I had an unnatural love for this silly show, but I don't want it to turn into Flavor of Love, which is coming out with it's like, 17th episode this season. It was pretty unreal before, but it's going to be uber fake now! Come on, MTV...

The show is rumored to begin in the spring of this year and will follow the same format of straight and lesbian hopefuls vying for Tila's affection. And be on the look out for Domenico's spinoff: That's Amore! featuring the Italian stallion and the moronic cowboy, Ashley.

RELATED LINKS:
How to save a bi
Here's to a shot at shameless self promotion

We'll take a cup o’ kindness yet, for auld lang syne

Welcome to 2008!

I wish I had some meaningful post for the first of the year, but all I've got are well wishes for everyone in the year ahead.

I also wanted to thank you for the support and for visiting The Jerc Store. Don't forget: You can now access the site by typing "thejercstore.com" in your browser!

In The Jerc Store's inaugural three months, this site has received almost 15,000 hits, with 80 percent of those hits coming in the month of December. It's a nice feeling knowing that you're writing for more than just your own menial entertainment.

Keep coming back daily to check out what's new--part of my New Year's resolution is to double my content, so hopefully I can make good on that one. Keep the comments coming, and remember, I have no way of knowing who posts what unless you post your name, so please don't be shy. And anyone who would like to contribute by guest writing, submitting ideas or linking up blogs, please let me know!

Thanks for visiting--HAPPY NEW YEAR 2008!

Dreams are the things confetti is made of

I always wondered who had the tedious job of sweeping up all that Time Square confetti on New Year's Day, but apparently they're dream makers.

This year, the wishes of people across the world will be printed on the bajillion pieces of confetti dumped on the crazies who visit Time Square tomorrow as part of a NYE Wishing Wall.

To have your wish printed, visit this Web site and fill out the form. Wishes will also be posted here. The wish-filled pieces of confetti will be mixed with plain confetti (is that an oxymoron), equalling more than 1 ton of crap falling on people's heads and onto the dirty streets.

I seriously could not think of a more worthless idea. Is anyone going to read this?? Oh wait, let me bend down and pick some wishes off the street. Or hey, you, there's a wish stuck in your hair, oh it's little Jimmy from Poughkeepsie.

And if you try to fill out the form to submit a wish, you get like, 10 characters to write your it. "I wish this year tha--" that's all you get. I wish for more space to write my damn wish!