King campaign

Maybe it's just me, but I feel like Burger King gets lost in the mix of fast food restaurants; it's like, seventh on my list. But yet another viral video advertising campaign has hit the scene ala BK: whopperfreakout.com.

The video is an extended version of a Burger King commercial, which shows customers freaking out after hearing the fast food chain has discontinued the Whopper. No tears are spilled, but the video shows the elicited anger and/or (bizarre) emotional attachment some people have to BK's signature sandwich.

One user who watched the video via youtube, said:

"I swear to god if I heard that the whopper is no longer available... I would start killin' people... even the joke of this is not funny !!!! A world without a Whopper is a world without air & water !!!"--Terfen

I'm not sure if this really makes me want to go to Burger King, but at least it reminds people that the place exists, and the . I also don't know if I completely believe the veracity of this being 'actual footage,' but it is pretty clever, and the ending is phenomenal.

If you like this or this, check out whopperfreakout.com.

Thanks, Matt!

Capital punishment is kaput

*Apologies for the lack of updating. I know I don't usually delve into the personal here, so I'll just leave it at sickness, work and the holidays are taking their toll on my brain. Thanks for still visiting!

Today, New Jersey Governor Jon Corzine signed legislation banning the death penalty in the Garden State. Eight men, formally sitting on death row, will now instead spend life in prison without parole.

Included in those criminals is Jesse Timmendequas, the convicted sex offender who raped and murdered 7-year-old Megan Kanka more than 10 years ago. That case lead to "Megan's Law," which requires neighbors to be alerted when a sex offender moves into the neighborhood.

Tell me this is not one of the scariest guys you've ever seen.

New Jersey becomes first state to ban capital punishment since the U.S. Supreme Court reinstated it in 1976, and the 14th to not use it altogether.

Touchy subject, but I'm still torn on the death penalty. My co-workers today were debating and it came down to a desire for vengeance versus the (sometimes small) possibility that that convicted person could be innocent and put to wrongly put to death.

Thoughts anyone? Or are we only prone to comment on less weighty issues? Which is perfectly fine, because I'm sure another innocuous post will soon be on its way, heh.

Uncorked

Paris Hilton has launched the latest in cold beverages, just in time for New Year's: champagne in a can.

Yes, that's right. No need to uncork that traditional bottle of champagne in luxurious fashion (even if it's like a $6 bottle, because that's how I roll)--now you can just shake up a can and spray Rich Prosecco all over you and your Gucci.

No word on cost, but a golden-bathed Paris has been promoting the product in Europe and posing for some 'hotttt' pictures. Unless those pictures come on the can, I'm pretty sure people will prefer the traditional 'splooging' champagne bottles.

The rogue elf who stole Christmas

Dear little brat,

You're getting nothing for Christmas. I hate you and I will kill your dog when I visit your house this year.

Love, Santa

Okay, so maybe that's a little exaggerated, but children in Canada who wrote to Santa this year have been receiving some naughty letters in return, maybe like that one above.

11,000 Canada Post employees and volunteers participate in a "Write to Santa" program and deliver millions of letters to children who sent letters to the North Pole, which has a special H0H 0H0 Canadian postal code.

But at least 10 nasty letters have been sent out to children in Ottawa this year by, what the Canada Post is calling, a "rogue elf." Until the perp is caught, the service has been shut down.

Chug, chug, chug--thud.

Here's a feat to strive for as you kick off your weekend:

A 64-year-old man chugged a liter of vodka in the Nuremberg airport after security informed him of new liquid carry-on regulations.

The man was returning to Dresdin from a holiday in Egypt when he encountered the new rules, which prohibit passengers from carrying larger quantities of liquid onto planes. The man, whose name was not released (thank God for his sake, his drinking friends would have a field day) was told at a security check he would have to either throw out the bottle of vodka or pay a fee to have his carry-on bag checked as cargo.

The man instead opted to chug the entire bottle--which is like three beers and then some in 10 seconds--resulting in near deadly alcohol poisoning. Guess the guy thought he could still party like it's 1969.

My favorite part of the story though, is this quote:

"Instead, he chugged the bottle down — and was quickly unable to stand or otherwise function, police said."--MSNBC

Models, models, we all fall down!

WARNING: SPOILERS

Last night's America's Next Top Model finale crowned the ninth winner of the modeling competition, but in its wake, a slew of controversy.

The final three--Chantal, Saleisha and Jenah--participated in the customary Cover Girl commercial, this time for CG's new Wetslick Fruit Spritzers. Try saying that three times fast, because none of the girls could even say it once.

Though they all looked gorgeous, the commercial takes were disastorous. Chantal, who took on the role of "Lemon Splash," looked like she actually took a bite out of a lemon with her left all all squinty and awkward looking. Jenah took the Jael approach and looked like she was mocking the Cover Girl image, which definitely didn't get by Tyra at the judging panel.

Going into judging, there was no clear frontrunner, but Jenah completely fell apart and her cynical criticism of models who "spew rainbows incessantly" sent her packing, which left the blond Barbie doll Chantal and the Rhianna look-a-like Saleisha to duke it out in a Chinese fashion show.

There has never been a final performance more awkward than Chantal tripping up the stilted background dancer and landing him straight on his ass with a 'THPLUNK'--yes, that's the noise he made [watch the clip]. Her already stunted energy completely deflated and Saleisha stomped all over her in the runway challenge.

The judging panel was odd: Instead of running through and comparing a number of photos throughout the competition, only three were selected (probably because neither of them were very photogenically strong, unlike Jenah or Heather). The main debate was Saleisha being too commercial versus Chantal being too amateur, and in the end, Tyra and company selected Saleisha as America's Next Top Model, cycle 9. She was awarded a $100,000 contract with Elite Model Management and a spread in Seventeen Magazine, and she proceded to jump around like a little kid on Christmas morning.

Now for the juicy stuff...

In casting, Tyra noted that Saleisha had attended Tyra's T-Zone Camp as a young girl, and it was clear that Saleisha had more modeling experience than most of the other girls. What was left out was Saleisha's had recently participated in a national campaign and starred in a fashion show on the Tyra show.

According to ANTM rules, contestants "must not have previous experience as a model in a national campaign within the last five years (including, but not limited to, appearances on television and print advertisements)." Though she has no speaking role in it, Saleisha appears in a Wendy's television ad that some of you may remember, mostly because it's only like a year old.

And if that's not shoddy enough for you, check out this video from Tyra's talk show. It's a fashion show for Rami Kashou (yes, that's Ramo from Project Runway, more shifty-ness there, ehem). This show as a whole is really creepy, from the music to Tyra seductively moving with the models, but fast forward to about 3:50 if you're just interested in Saleisha.

Yes, that's some shady business there, but between the two, Saleisha is a better model. Then again, maybe that's why she already had a career pre-ANTM.

Colorful, butt designer?

Now, I always said that if someone bought me a designer handbag, I'd light it on fire because I consider it an enormous waste of money, but anyone who thinks this designer product is worth the purchase should wipe their ass with it.

...well, that's what intended for, duhhh.
Renova has introduced luxury toilet paper in green, red, orange and black. Umm, kind of weird, yes? A 3-pack is selling for 7.51 euro (about 10.98 USD).

The best is the way they market this on the website:

• The RED is the power of emotion. It is what gives us our Vitality and Passion.
• Renova Black tissue: a voluptuous texture, soft and glamorous; a paper full of pleasure.
• Tissue paper in bright orange to celebrate exotism in the bathroom. Enjoy!

Should we really be describing bathroom activities with adjectives like 'voluptuous' and 'passion'? Maybe not, but you can also buy tissues and paper towels to match!

"I've made more bad decisions at 3 a.m. than I can list"

WARNING: SPOILERS

Last night's episode of Project Runway was probably the most rousing yet.

Confirming preseason rumors, one of my favs, Jack, was booted last night after exhibiting an outbreak of MRSA (staph infection) above his lip. Sadly, Jack opted to leave the show to seek medical treatment, though rumors are still flying about whose decision it really was. [click here to visit Jack's MySpace page] How about one last Jack pic before we move on? God, he's pretty...
To keep the competition at a high, Jack's replacement arrives: It's last week's auf'd contestant, Chris March! It may not have been such a surprise to saavy PR-watchers, because there were a few slight mentionings of the big man early on in the episode, which rarely ever happens, but it was nice to see someone who did not deserve to go home get another chance.

For the challenge, the designers received a different set of models: women who had recently lost a significant amount of weight, ranging from 40-something pounds to 139! The women arrived on the runway dressed in their former-self's favorite outfit, and each was randomly paired with a designer. The contestants were given $10 at Mood and one day to create a new look that fit the client both physically and personally.

Poor Steve got stuck with an enormous, gaudy, beaded, lacy, polyester wedding dress. The rest of the outfits were pretty bad, but Kit put on the dress and said she felt like the Corpse Bride.

Chris was allowed to work through the night to make up for lost time (which produced the classic Tim Gunn quote above), Ricky wore high heels better than I do and Kevin showed how selfless he is by helping the desperate Steve when it came down to crunch time. And can I just say the best part of each episode is Christian's pre-runway commentary, where he picks out whose designs are "God awful" and will "make the judges die because of it." He's a little bitch, but I love him.

Overall, the runway produced some mixed results. Christian and Kevin clear favorites; both of their models looked fantastic and their fashions would definitely sell. Kevin took a canary yellow blazer and turned into a hot tube top for God's sake!

The judges also placed Jillian in the top three, which I think is absurd because she barely followed directions. Instead of taking the client's top, she purchased the same color fabric from mood and turned into a dress. Hello cheater. Rami or Kit probably should have landed above Jillian with the youthful but classy designs they turned out using the original fabric.

Chris, Elisa and Steve fell into the bottom three this week. To me, Elisa's outfit was the most hideous. Not only did it look "frumpier" than the original outfit, she had to have made her 50-year-old model make the "rock and roll" hand sign on the runway, which should be grounds for elimination itself.

With the wedding dress, Steve had the biggest challenge ahead of him. At the same time, he could have come up with something phenomenal, and he delivered what the judges called an outfit for a funeral, a French maid's outfit, or an outfit for French maid going to a funeral. It was terrible. Had Kit gotten something like that, her outfit would have rocked. No doubt.

In the end, Steve went home, and deservedly so. And even though the jacket he designed this week looked extremely similar to his first week's look with less stripes, Christian took home top honors and scored immunity from elimination next week.

Five down--10 to go. Make it work!

RELATED LINKS:
Episode 1
Episode 2
Episode 3
Episode 4

Bringing the game out of the shadows?

Use of steroids in Major League Baseball has been prevalent for more than a decade and practiced by players on every club in the league, according to Senator George Mitchell's report, disseminated today.

Notable names in the Mitchell Report are Roger Clemens, Andy Pettitte, Miguel Tejada, Paul LoDuca and Eric Gagne.

It also includes names linked to steroids in the past, such as Barry Bonds, Jose Canseco, Mark McGwire, Jason Giambi, Gary Sheffield, Rafael Palmeiro and Sammy Sosa.

To read the lengthy report or view the highlights, click here.

Brian McNamee has been named in the report as a possible distributor of steroids, specifically to Clemens and Pettitte. He "injected Clemens approximately four time in the buttocks over a several week period with needles that Clemens provided," the report states.

Senator Mitchell was put in charge of the investigation by MLB Commissioner Bud Selig. He is urging that no disciplinary actions be taken, unless it compromises the integrity of the game, but how does deception, lying and cheating not compromise baseball??

"The commissioner should give the players and everyone else the chance to make a fresh start. That's what baseball needs."--George Mitchell

It's important to remember that because a player's name is included in the report does not mean that they definitely used steroids, because Mitchell had no subpoena power and a large majority of the information did not come straight from the players's mouths. And just because a player's name is not listed in the report, does not mean he's 100% clean, either.

Mitchell, a former federal prosecutor, is a director of the Boston Red Sox and was questioned during today's news conference if bias is present in this report. He, of course, denied that by using a perfectly politicized spin--something about Ireland?

There will obviously be more to come on this report, but this is certainly the biggest bombshell dropped on the steroid scandal in quite some time.

Bud Selig will hold a press conference today at 4 p.m.

"We always do it nice and rough"

Rock pioneer Ike Turner, aka Mr. Tina Turner, died yesterday in his San Diego home.

Though Ike apparently influenced a number of current hit makers and won a Grammy in the traditional blues album category this year for "Risin' With the Blues," he will forever be known as that monster that beat the daylights out of Tina Turner. Whether that's the complete truth or not, we'll never know...

There is currently no word on cause of death, but his current wife reported that he had emphysema. Ike was 76 years old.

What is 'get better soon, Alex'?

Keep Alex Trebek in your prayers, people.

The 67-year-old Jeopardy! host suffered a heart attack at his home last night. He had no previous heart condition.

It was not clear when he would be released from an L.A. hospital, but he is expected to recover and return to taping the game show in January.

Alex Trebek is the man. End of story.

Humdrum Hills "finale"

WARNING: SPOILERS

Dry your mascara-laden eyes, Hills fans. Despite the "finale" episode last night, the season is not over!

Yes, if you missed last night's special aftershow you missed nothing but MTV compensating for the writer's strike and extending its most popular reality show's third season, beginning "in the first quarter" of 2008.

Lauren announced that viewers would "get to see our whole trip to Paris, and everything that follows afterwards." But based on last night's "last hurrah," I'm thinking these episodes are gonna be a snoozefest. Let's recap:

Heidi and Spencer went their separate ways, but we're not actually sure if they broke up...?

Whitney is asked to again join the skeleton-like Lisa Love in Paris and Lauren is sad. Whitney accidentally asks Lauren what Paris is like this time of year (duhhh) and Lauren is sad again. Then, to the shock of viewers across the nation (note sarcasm, please), Lauren is invited on the trip and she shares her Cheshire-cat like smile with us all.

But wait! What about Brody? Will Lauren again be forced to choose between some pretty boy who is likely banging every other blond girl in LA and the je ne sais qua of Pari?

Actually, it doesn't matter, because she's going for like, four days and she and Brody aren't even dating. YAWN.

There was a lot of self-recollection time while the cast drove in their fancy schmancy cars and half of them got on airplanes. My favorite part was of it all was Audrina, sitting alone in the apartment doing nothing while everyone else is going through some life-changing experience.

Overall, this finale was super lame and the only thing more pathetic than it was the slopfest that followed on the aftershow. I don't think MTV could have picked two more annoying and incompetent hosts. They got no information out of the show's "stars" and they were practically drooling all over the place.

I know this is a paltry recap effort, but please, let me direct you to a fantastic analysis of last night's episode. It's so wonderful, I must give it props.

David stuck in the John

A Scottish man who was trapped in a lawn bowling club bathroom for 100 hours was freed today. I think just one question remains:

What the hell is lawn bowling??

No, really. David Leggat, 55, survived nearly four days inside the bathroom in Aberdeen after the door jammed and the handle fell off. That's some high class country club there. He had no food and no cell phone. The paper said he survived by dipping his feet into hot water (and I don't really want to know what water or how it got hot).

Leggat was rescued when the cleaning woman arrived to collect her equipment, and what did the man's prolific emergence speech: "At least there was a toilet to use" (not joking).

Bravo for blooming relationships!

One of my fav Project Runway season four designers and a Top Chef finalist have gotten together to form a couple made in Bravo reality television heaven: Jack and Dale.

The two gay reality stars actually met over MySpace and ran into each other at the OUT100 party. Dale said they two are taking baby steps and that they like keeping it "incestuous," as in "in the Bravo family." Jack also took time out on his blog to alleviate any concerns that Dale might contract HIV from Jack, who is HIV positive but on medication that lessens his viral load.

I'm happy for them, especially the blending of two of my fav reality shows, so please please please - keep the gay bashing comments to a minimum.

Dog eat dog

Let's just get this out of the way because I was sick of hearing about this like, two months ago:

Michael Vick has been sentenced to 23 months in prison for his financing and involvement in a dog fighting ring--Bad Newz Kennels--and for killing dogs that did not deserve to die.

The maximum Vick faced was five years, so he received a sentencing that was middle of the road, which was surprising considering that this judge was evinced as a hard ass.

Vick already has lost his endorsement deals, which some estimates put as high as $50 million, and also lost the $71 million left on his contract with the Falcons, but he still got off easy. He'll probably serve eight months and get out just in time for football season.

Serial swine

A 58-year-old Canadian pig farmer, accused of killing women and feeding their remains to his pigs, has been found guilty on the first six of 26 murder charges.

Robert "Willie" Pickton automatically received a life sentence when the jury found him guilty of murdering prostitutes and drug addicts on his farm. If he is accountable for those deaths, he would become Canada's worst serial killer.

An undercover cop, who had been placed in Pickton's jail cell and gained his trust, said that Pickton had planned to kill one more woman--"make it an even 50"--then kill another 25 after he he took a short break. Come on, you know that killing prostitutes is hard work.

One witness said she walked in on a blood-covered Pickton as a woman's body dangled from a chain in the farm's slaughterhouse. Another witness testified that Pickton told him how he strangled his alleged victims and fed their remains to his pigs. Did he run out of grain and slop??

Shouldn't they issue a recall on any bacon that's come out of Pickton's pig farm, because it would totally gross me out to eat digested prostitute bacon. That can't be kosher.

I am McBluffin

Hawaii and Wal-Mart are trying to blow up every single McLovin-wannabe's spot.

Mayor Mufi Hannemann, the mayor of Honolulu, demanded that Wal-Mart remove "Superbad" DVDs from shelves because of the gimmicky, completely fake driver's license of "McLovin" included in the packaging.

"It was foolish of the movie studio to include this prop in the DVD, particularly because it could be used by unscrupulous people to deceive others who are unfamiliar with our driver’s license." --Mayor Mufi Hannemann

Can you seriously not tell that this is fake?? There's a barcode on there that looks like it's from the back of the damn DVD.

The mayor announced this Wednesday and then commended Wal-Mart for its speedy actions Thursday. Good job, Wal-Mart. You treat your employees like crap and practice sexual discrimination, but you can certainly got a talent for pulling DVDs off shelves for really asinine reasons.

FYI

Just so you all don't think I've thrown in the towel so soon, posts will be limited this weekend as I will very rarely have a computer available to me. But, I do promise to come back full force Sunday evening. See you then!

Throwing your financial future away for a t-shirt

I stumbled across this Consumerist article listing some statistics on young adults and credit card debt, and it brought me back to those days in college where I'd sign up for a credit card just to get a free t-shirt (just like the one below) or chat with the cute frat guys.

...But thank God I never gave them my real information. I'm not sure where exactly these numbers came from, but they sure are pretty grim!

• 56% of all undergraduates report obtaining their first credit card when they were 18
• 83% of all undergraduates in 2001 had at least one credit card.
• The average student has four credit cards.
• College students' balances have gone up 134% in the last decade.
• Three out of five students with credit cards maxed them out during their freshman year.
• 71% of young adult cardholders do not pay their balance off in full each month.
• The average undergraduate credit card balance is $2,169.
• College seniors graduate with an average of $4,000 in credit card debt.

Three out of five students max their cards out during freshman year? Some of these kids don't even know how to make scrambled eggs, but they're given "free money" to piss away on booze and burritos.

I didn't get my first real credit card (not check card) until right after college, and I'm probably a credit card company's worst nightmare: a young adult who doesn't buy anything she couldn't buy with cash, and pays each balance in full, on time, every month. Boy am I glad my parents installed the fear of debt in me at a young age.

Boobs from a boob

If you're still stuck on what to get people for Christmas, considering shelling out like, $300 to bid on porn star Mary Carey's breast implants on eBay!

The star of "Big Breasted Beauties" has recently removed her 36-DD implants for 36-DDD, and said that while under anesthesia, she realized that she could sell the used implants to benefit cancer research.

She's gotta be one smart porn star to come up with that while unconscious.

The current high bid on eBay is $2,700 (plus $12 shipping). Carey says she wants the winner to have a "Mary Christmas"--brilliant!

Carey said she will donate 90 percent of the autograph fake boob proceeds to the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation, and the rest of the money will go toward her mother's medical bills, because she jumped out of a four-story building last year. Um??

"I'm actually overall very anti-plastic surgery. I watched my mom go through 11 surgeries (for her injuries) and it's like, for me to voluntarily put myself through that, the only right thing to do is make money and donate it to charity." --Mary Carey

Other than her adult films, you may remember Carey from her campaign for governor against Arnold, but you can catch her beating drug and alcohol addiction in VH1's new reality show "Celebrity Rehab," starring Dr. Drew, coming soon.