25 things you don't care about unless they're yours

I thought the "25 things" note on Facebook was getting a little out of control, and the fact that CNN and TIME wrote about it this week just reaffirmed that.

For those unfamiliar with the popular "chain" note on the social networking site, it's basically as follows: You are "tagged" by someone and you write 25 random things about yourself, "tag" 25 of your friends --including the person who tagged you-- and it continues on from there.

And while I (unfortunately) am guilty of partaking in this narcissistic fad, I've definitely read some things about people and said, "WHO CARES?" Do I care what your childhood pet's name was? Not really. Do I stay up late wondering whether or not you've ever been to Tahiti. Not so much.

So, why is this blowing up? Because people like to talk about themselves -- duh. Isn't that the whole reason we have Facebook? Keeping in touch with people is nice and all, but most people really just want to see how many "friends" they can accumulate and how many photos they can be tagged in.

But hey, like I said... I'm guilty. I did it, too. But my 25 random things are more awesome than most people, haaaa.

Anyway, enough of that. I thought this TIME article was hilarious. I'd do the same (i.e. point out stupid things people I know have written), but I wouldn't want to embarrass anyone. Still, it's pretty ridiculous that thing has been recreated 5 million times...

From time.com:
A girl I knew in high school has memorized all of Janet Jackson's dance routines. A college acquaintance is afraid of train whistles. Five separate people harbor lifelong desires to visit New Zealand.

How do I know these things? Because they won't stop writing about them on Facebook! Facebook's "25 Things About Me" meme seems harmless enough; people write 25 facts about themselves and post them on their Facebook pages, just as they do with videos, status updates and photos of last weekend's party. An estimated 5 million of these notes — that's 125 million facts — have appeared on the website within the past week.

Assuming it takes someone 10 minutes to come up with their list, this recent bout of viral narcissism has sent roughly 800,000 hours of worktime productivity down the drain. But it's just so stupid. Most people aren't funny, they aren't insightful, and they share way too much. Facebook is a loose social network; a "friend" on Facebook might translate to someone you'd barely recognize in real life. I don't care that my college roommate's sister is anemic or that my stepcousin's boyfriend gets nervous around old people (apparently he's afraid they're going to die).

Below are 25 facts I wish people hadn't told me about themselves. They come from friends, friends-of-friends, friends-of-friends-of-friends and coworkers. They are all real, though I wish some of them were not.

1. I eat tacos with a fork.
2. I was fat in middle school. The wake of that horror has yet to subside.
3. I keep forgetting that Barack Obama is our President.
4. I have been pooped on by a monkey.
5. I am addicted to the ass-slap dance move. Sometimes I don't even notice I'm doing it.
6. When I finally told my now fiancé that I liked him (as in, liked him liked him), I drunkenly gave him the Anchorman line, "I want to be on you." He had only seen the movie once and had no idea what it was from.
7. Just because I realize that Asian women are smarter, more attractive, and have about themselves a generally superior level of class does not mean I have a fetish. Just that I'm racist.
8. I eat gummy bears by tearing them limb from limb and eating their heads last.
9. I can't grow hair on my arms.
10. Two of my best friends are under five feet tall and I have an intense fear of midgets.
11. I think yoga is incredibly spiritual. I know the Lord is with me in my downward dog.
12. I was born with jaundice.
13. I was born pigeon-toed.
14. I was born with an extra kidney. I wish I could have sold it on the black market and made some money, but it was underdeveloped and did nothing but cause me to wet the bed until the third grade.
15. I like to tape my thumbs to my hands to see what it would be like to be a dinosaur.
16. A horse once fell over while I was riding it.
17. I don't believe in democracy.
18. I cried when Spock died in Star Trek II.
19. I drink two glasses of wine every night before bed. Wait, did I just admit to alcoholism?
20. If you asked me to tell you my favorite movie, I would have a hard time not saying Titanic.
21. I once sent a teacher into early retirement by pretending to be a cheetah and swiping at her from under a desk.
22. I once ran into New Kids On the Block's Joey McIntyre in the lobby of an off-Broadway show. I told him he was the first boy I ever loved. He laughed and kind of smiled. This was the most gratifying moment of my life.
23. My friends say that when they shave my back, I purr like a walrus.
24. I don't understand what people see in the Godfather trilogy.
25. Sometimes I think pee smells like Cheerios.

Like something out of 'Thriller'

I know I'm a few days late on the Michael Jackson birthday jokes, so I won't even try. But I stumbled across this photo slideshow of the King of Pop's 50 years of faces and I couldn't not share it.

Click here to see the show. The transition is not only mind-boggling, but it's so terrifying I should have waited til Halloween to post it.

And as a backward belated birthday wish to Michael, check out the video below. Just, uhh, replace every 'Lisa' with 'Michael'...?

9021Oh noo.....

Thanks to a quick commercial in the middle of tonight's season finale of "Gossip Girl" (and a heads up from my friend, Jackie), I have learned of the CW's intention to make a 90210 spinoff.

When I first heard about the reinvention of one of my favorite teenage dramas, I was like totally stoked, but after learning of the show's intended plotline, it is not looking so good in the upscale neighborhood.

This spinoff, which is set to premiere in the fall, is based around the Mills family (reminiscent of The Walshes), who have moved from St. Louis to Beverly Hills and are adjusting to the scenery.

According to E! News, there's Harry Mills (aka the Jim Walsh of the series)and his wife Celia (aka Cindy Walsh) and the couple's biological daughter, Annie--who much like Brenda Walsh--is into acting and alternative music and longs to fit into the cool crowd at school.

But in order to differentiate from the original series, the Mills don't have twins--they instead have Dixon, an adopted son who's the same age as Annie and was taken in by her family six years earlier. And apparently the show is looking to cast a minority actor in the role in order to more accurately depict California than its predecessor's completely whitebread cast.

And while there are Andrea Zuckerman and David and Donna-like characters, none of the original cast will be featured in the show. E! reports, however, that both Tori Spelling and Ian Ziering have said that they would participate if asked.

This...yeah. Not so good. I doubt CW will strike gold as they have with "Gossip Girl" (which is seriously one of the best shows on television these days), but I will probably end up checking this out...if nothing else, but to see what The Peach Pit looks like and if Nat is still alive.

For a taste of retro 90210, watch the show's intro below. Gotta love those good times on the beach.

"Your balls are showing"

Spencer Tunick, a New York photographer famous for large-scale nude projects, has created some 'balls-out' shots to celebrate The Beautiful Game.

Tunick shot 1,840 nude volunteers yesterday in Vienna's Ernst Happel stadium--the site of the EURO 2008 — the European soccer championship — which will be played next month.

The photographer had hoped to get 2,008 people out for the shoot, but no go. The shoot took place over a several hours, and the models posed in various positions throughout the stadium. [click here to view the gallery]

The goal, according to an ad for volunteers, was "to capture and combine the spirit of sports, the grand sweeping waves of stadium architecture and the abstract relation of the human form to modern structures."

Hannah tries to pull a little switcheroo

Big news on the Hannah Montana front: Miley Cyrus is not the only bubbly adolescent bouncing around the stage during her "Hannah Montana" tour--there's an impostor, GASP!!!!

Yeah, this isn't really a big deal to me, but I know it comes as an uber shock to the bajillions of Miley Cyrus fans to find out that Miley is using a body double during shows.

When you check out the video below, you'll notice around the 2:20 mark that Hannah Montana is ushered into a trap door by a back-up dancer who blatantly covers her with a black cloak, and then suddenly, a Hannah lookalike pops out wearing gaudy sunglasses and hair covering her face and starts dancing like a complete moron. So obv not HM, duuuuhhh.

Representatives for Miley said the time is used for a quick costume change and otherwise, the teen superstar sings live the entire show.

I have two problems with this. First of all, what is the difference between Hannah Montana and Miley Cyrus during the show? Someone please clear this up for me. Actually, I don't really care. My second concern is this: For all the money that this little girl and this franchise make, they can't come up with a better and less conspicuous way for the girl to have a wardrobe change?

I'm serious. Watch the video and see how awful the change is. Actually, this entire segment looks like a complete yawnfest. Why are people paying thousands of dollars and killing off their parents for this again?

Your barista today is: Ronald McDonald?

Years ago, no one would have seen a McDonalds v. Starbucks war brewing, but now, the battle is on.

Both companies have been totally cramping each other's style lately: McDonalds has beefed up its coffee culture and Starbs has installed drive throughs and started serving breakfast sandwiches. The competition has been heating up, but you can add one more point in the McD's column because the fast food company plans to add coffee bars and baristas in 14,000 U.S. locations this year.

The move, which the company sees adding $1 million in sales, will bring cappuccinos, lattes, mochas and the Frappe, a drink similar to Starbucks' ice-blended Frappuccino, to the menu.

I'm up in the air on this one. Most people who go to McDonalds are looking for cheap, fast food and drink. Even if you know what the heck a macchiato is, Starbucks can be intimidating and it can definitely take some time to get the beverage in hand. But apparently, McDonalds has already been testing out the system in Kansas, running ads that claim you won't get a nasty look for mispronouncing the size of your beverage--ooooh, Starbucks. Burrrn!

But even if McDonalds' sales fall shorter than expected, there's no way they're gonna tank as badly as Starbucks has in the last year.

No holds barred for Hannah

I bet my parents are glad that Hannah Montana did not exist during my childhood. Kids across the nation are begging, kicking and screaming to get their hands on HM tickets these days, and seriously, who wants to disappoint their kids?

But at the same time, spineless parents who will stop at nothing to get these tickets to please their kiddies (and probably brag around the water cooler) are ruining it for everyone.

Priscilla Ceballos, a woman from Garland, Texas, recently submitted an essay on behalf of her daughter, which began with the line, "My daddy died in Iraq this year," for a Hannah Montana Rock Your Holidays Essay Contest. Prizes included tickets to Hannah Montana's sold-out concert in Albany, New York in January, airfare and accommodations to the show and a Hannah Montana gift bag.

Her essay won the contest... only one problem: it was one big, fat lie.

The woman told contest officials that the girl's father, Sgt. Jonathon Menjivar, died April 17 in a roadside bombing in Iraq, but the Department of Defense has no record of anyone with that name dying in Iraq.

Ceballos admitted to the deception, according to a spokeswoman for Club Libby Lu, the store holding the contest. The company is considering taking away the tickets.

"We did the essay and that's what we did to win. We did whatever we could do to win." --Priscilla Ceballos, in an interview with Dallas TV station KDFW.

Ruthless, but hey, if a good friend of mine hadn't gotten me tickets to the upcoming Spice Girls concert, maybe I'd consider doing the same.

Guns don't kill people; Chuck Norris kills people...and books about him

Last week, everyone's favorite roundhouse-kicking, fear-inspiring, Black Belt Grand Master is suing Penguin Group, Inc. publishing house over the accuracy of new book titled "The Truth About Chuck Norris."

Norris sued the company and the book's creator, Ian Spector, claiming that his good image is being spoiled by a book that depicts him as callous and unlawful and which he says includes false "facts" that are sometimes racist and lewd, according to the Associated Press.

He cannot be serious.

Does he not like being known as the man the Boogeyman checks under the bed for or the reason that Waldo is hiding? Is he denying the fact that when he does a push-up he is in fact lifting himself up and not pushing the Earth down?? I'm sure we could go on for days [click here for an intense list of Chuck Norris "facts"].

In the prologue of the book, the author thanks Chuck Norris for "playing along," but Walker Texas Ranger claims he never authorized anyone to use his name, image or likeness in connection with commercial sales of the book, which was published on Nov. 29.

The lawsuit seeks unspecified damages, a halt to publication and a recall of books already sold. If Chuck Norris really wants those books back, he can seek them down himself. Yeah, that's right. I said it.